Remembering.

Back in 2004-05 I was moonlighting as a radio DJ for the Blue Network.I worked the grave yard shift on weekends. I miss those times. I miss being in the studio all alone, with the monitors and control panels in front of me and knowing that I was being heard throughout the country. I miss sharing my music with the listeners and sometimes just taking in their calls and listening to what they had to say.

Looking back, I can say that my audition was a complete disaster. I completely froze in the middle of my mock dj'ing session, not knowing what to say.I'm still not sure how I ever managed to get the job but I did and the affair lasted for a year, they didn't renew my contract the reason being that my voice was to mushy mushy for radio. Why did they take me on board in the first place then? But I guess it all worked out in the end, I couldn't have gone on moonlighting with my hellish work schedule. And you know how sometimes when people say that when one door closes another will open? I found that the door led me to my present NGO work, to which I have learned alot from. I've travelled to many different countries, worked with many different people from different cultures and they have in a way inspired me.They are passionate in what they do and they are really enthusiastic in wanting to make a difference in the world.

But back to the Blue Network story. That one year stint with the Blue Network was a surreal experience. I learned so much. It was then that I began to listen to Anita Baker, Indie Arie and Adina Howard just to name a few.

I had a crush on one of the first guy that I double banked with (that means where you had to sit in with a senior dj during his show and learn the ropes) I can still remember his perfume. He was wearing Clinique Happy for men. So from that day onwards, I notice that he would stay and keep me company whenever I had to double bank. Once he even stayed till 3am until I was done with my shift. And I would rush over to the office right after I was done with my day job just to get a glimpse of him. You know how it some romance novels they say that all of a sudden, you notice that how green the grass looked, how beutiful the flowers were and how the sky looked so clear? It was the same with me except that I didn't notice how bad the traffic was any longer in KL. Everything was just beautiful. It was some sort of a hide-and-seek game between us. I got tongue tied whenever I was near him. My heart felt like it could actually burst out at any moment. But it didn't get anywhere. Kind of difficult to be in a relationship when working together. The other guys especially the afternoon boys started to notice something and would tease us mercilessly. But the state of being on a natural high was exciting while it lasted.

He is still there, doing what he does best and occasionally I would tune in and listen to him. I would smile hearing the voice that a few years back, made my heart beat a little bit faster.

I would play this song when I was on air, thinking of him and I noticed that he would too ;) It could mean something else for him or maybe he just felt like airing the song but I would like to think of it and remember it as his way of saying that he liked me too... a girl can dream ;)

It's that look in your eyes, that say you love me
And all the silly things that you do
Those feelings that I get when ever you're near me
Tells me you're for me And I'm the one for you