My mother and aunts are not big fans of my definition of hospitality.
Many moons ago, when life was all about exams, assignments and when is my scholarship ever going to be banked in, my home was the home-away-from-home central to all my friends. Come Friday or sometimes even earlier than that, you will see a group of loud Teslians (when were we ever quiet anyway?) trudging the hilly residential area of UPM, lugging with us bags filled with a week's worth of laundry, slowing making our way to the bus stop. Metro bus number 70. It goes from Serdang all the way to Kotaraya. It's been a long long time since I last heard "masuk lagi! masuk lagi" Belakang tu masuk lagi!" Yes abang conductor bas, I'm already squashed back here you know. Ewwww..and what is that smell? Oh, it's that guy with his hands raised high in the air holding on the railings. I would mumble and grumble and swear to myself and say "cik abang, ever heard of deodorant?" A little bird told me sometime ago that particular cik abang with the body odour is now an engineer with a very well known foreign oil company. So note to self; don't judge a person by his body odour.
At home, I prefer to treat my friends like they are part of the family. I would ask them to cook with me, share the chores etc. My mother would often nag and stare at me willing that her stare could actually do me bodily harm. "They're guests, she would say. Why are you making them do work?" Free labor mother, I would say and quickly scoot out of her way before another long lecture on hospitality which could get me into a hospital, nag overdose'd. i wouldn't be comfortable staying at the home of a friend and do nothing. I know that's being hospitable, but I'd rather be in the kitchen helping out or even help watering the plants.
Maybe I'm weird in that sense, but for you to actually be a friend of mine, means that you are comfortable around me and my home.
But of course, I won't do that to friends of parents or elder relatives. So to potential monther-in-laws, fret not, you shall be treated like a queen.